on intentions and outcomes - of men and women

don't worry - this is not going to be one of those spiritual essays on how your intentions shape your outcomes and how that leads you to true love. but it's true - sometimes even the best intentions can backfire and get you into trouble; and being a white woman in africa - well, it's that - but for once I got one of them back ;-))

on our way back from kibuye we got on one of the comparibly big government buses. it was luxury compared to the other means of transport we had been forced to use - and as happened many times on that trip - as soon as we commented on something that was finally going well, it f'd up. I think it was about 20 minutes after I said this is the best bus journey we've had so far... we're about 20 minutes outside of kigali - it's getting dark and we're looking forward to being home, having a shower and going out later. then there's this 'clock, clock' noise and a lopsided bumping feeling to the bus. we had a flat tyre... argh. we get out and stand on the side of the road watching the spectacle unfold. they get the key to loosen the screws on the wheels. this involves several men discussing, giving orders, finally one starts jumping on the handle of the key to have more leverage to loosen the screws. then they start the engine and drive the bus onto a rock. by that point I gave up hope thinking - how on earth are they going to get the wheel off and the replacement wheel on? don't they have a jack?
I called my friend to come and rescue us. I explained to her which road we were on and roughly where I thought we were. it should have taken her 30 mins max. round about the time she should have turned up the bus was miraculously fixed (you should never loose faith when in africa) and pulled out - without us. to add to all the trouble my phone had run out of battery so I had no way of communicating with my friend who was freaking out along the road. eventually this man explained that we were further away from the city than what I'd told her - and after another hour or so of standing by the side of the road in the pitch black, surrounded by random strangers who no doubt just wanted our money, our friend finally turned up and rescued us.

the morale of the story: the good idea of calling a friend to the rescue turned out to not be the best idea; just as well the country is relatively safe and luckily nothing happened to us standing on the side of the road wearing a headtorch to make ourselves recognisable...

and now - of men and women. here men can be a right pest, not really knowing when to leave you alone. what european men often don't have enough, they have too much here - always commenting, hitting on you, trying their luck. it gets really tiring - and even if you're outright rude and explicit with them they don't get it.

so - the scene is evening rush hour traffic in kampala, my friend and I are standing on the side of the road with our backpacks after a long and dusty bus ride followed by a lox and cream cheese bagle in the 'new york kitchen' situated in a corner of an underground car park at the garden city shopping mall; nothing like eating a bagle in a cloud of unfiltered diesel fumes ;-)) we are waiting to be picked up by my friend with whom we're going to stay.
as is usual a boda boda (moto-taxi) drives by - ugandan boda-drivers are super cool; they all wear sunglasses and no helmets. he slows down, looks us up and down and goes 'taxi?' - we answer no and turn our heads in the opposite direction. he carries on driving whilst not taking his eyes off us. he is basically driving in one direction whilst his visual attention is focused in the opposite one.

we hear a BANG and then the sound of metal scraping the tarmac - and of course we turn our head in the direction of the noise. well, guess what? the boda driver was so busy looking at two dusty tired mzungu girls that he promply didn't see the pick up that was stood in the road - and went crash bang into it... the driver got up, holding his balls, swearing and recovering his bike which had slid across the road and onto the second lane.

my friend and I tried not to laugh; but tears were rolling down our cheeks whilst our bodies shook with laughter. serves him right!