guma guma!

I haven't been to a live open air concert in a long time; even before coming to africa. and I have to say I do miss it, a lot. so - the guma guma! party, a.k.a. 50 years primus anniversary was a no-miss event. (primus is one of the two local beers; and obviously they are celebrating their 50th anniversary this year)

the event was taking place at the stadium and VIP tickets cost 15 quid. this included VIP parking, free beer all night long and a snack pack. the line up probably means nothing to most of you - but I went mainly for p-square, two brothers from nigeria - and they're big here. the event was supposed to start at 3pm saturday. we turned up around 6 - which was still early; this is africa :-))

at that point they were holding the finale of what could probably be called 'rwanda's next superstar' on the stage. it reminded me a lot of the wednesday night at the appollo theatre in harlem.

basically primus had organised a bunch of roadshows across the country to identify the new talents and on saturday the last 5 contestants were fighting for the trophy (a cheque worth $ 2,500 - that's a LOT here). it was painful to watch; they were singing and dancing on stage one by one - and then the public had to vote by either shouting 'guma, guma!' if they liked them, or 'boooooh' to clearly booh them out. talk about public humiliation! they guy looking like michael jackson won - no surprises there.

being in the VIP section of the party was not what you would probably expect in europe at all; there was no fancy VIP lounge, no pretty waitresses and no goodie bags. there was, however, free beer all night long. only one type, sometimes it came cold, sometimes it didn't - but free all the time. it also came with a snack pack; which when we tried to get it the first time wasn't available - they had just run out. this is africa. the second time round we were more lucky - or so I thought. I opened the aluminium box only to find that its contents weren't half as exciting as I would've hoped. it contained the following: a napkin with a tootpick, a piece of baguette with blueband, a piece of chapati which tasted of old shoe and a fruit-flavoured samosa.

luckily my friend managed to smile his way to a few chunks of sausage and one mini-brochette; that kind of made the 'meal' bareable. but once again - we're in africa, sod it - wash it down with some free beer and get on with it.

once we'd finished our 'meal' the first international act - blu3 from uganda - came on stage. it's what you would call a girl group - 3 ladies all dressed in next to nothing which very tightly enveloped their bodies. the music was ok - east african r'n'b - you've gotta like it! they kind of went on about 'have you ever been in love and have felt like you're in prison? this next song is called prison!' - 'have you ever been in love so much that you felt you could fly?' - so generally, a lot of singing about love which is what r'n'b is usually about.

after the girls had finished they gave us an impressive light show with the laser lights accompanied by a best-of-michael-jackson mix, 30 seconds of each great hit. people went mental. and then the main act of the night came on: p-square.

now - you have to have lived in east africa to know them I think. they're two brothers from nigeria and they sing songs like 'do me' and 'no one like u' - it's cheesy but it definitely grows on you after a while. again, you sort of have to like it really. it's like blue band, it's everywhere.

anyway - their show was quite good and we had a good dance and a laugh.

but the best part was really after the main concert; again, the break before the last group came on - and they played a few techno classics and again provided us with a rather impressive light show. for about 15 minutes it didn't feel like we were in africa at all; it was awesome, the starry sky, the lights, the music, the fact that there were enough people around us to create a good atmosphere, but not too many to make you feel claustrophobic - in short - that moment was WICKED!

shortly aftwards they brought on the last act; no idea what they were called; but they were about 35 people on stage and playing congolese rumba. after shaking our booties for 1o minutes we'd had enough and decided to leave the stadium after 6 hours to head out to get some dinner. I was phantasising about a greasy kebab place around the corner; but since that is not available here we went for steaks and burgers instead - not bad at half past midnight :-)) this is also africa - and it ROCKS!

be open to your happiness and sadness as they arise

last night I was chatting to a couple of friends about life and love - and somehow we got talking about these moments in life, where everything is just ticking over perfectly - there is no disturbance, no interference. generally you immediately get suspicious - think that a big disaster is just around the corner - anticipate it all blowing up in your face.

I guess it's kind of natural to think that because we are so conditioned to never quite trust life, always expect problems, obstacles and hardships to come to us - because if you just ride the wave of happiness the crash will be too hard, and don't be fooled - crash you will.

I have spent many years of my life living like that - missing out on the perfect moments in life because I was looking for the imperfections. and guess what - unless you jump without fear of hitting the ground, you will never know what it means to really fly.
not so long ago I finally, and for the first time in life, actively pushed off the cliff and jumped, arms spread out wide, smiling and flying like I've never flown before. it was the most intoxicating experience in my life so far; the best thing ever - and as soon as I decided to ride the wave, let go and fly high for a short while my life was simply perfect. and I mean perfect in the sense of everything lined up perfectly - it was like the perfect domino chain - each piece hit the next one and they all fell down in a perfect line. and for the first time I managed to not question any of it - rather, I just accepted it, said thanks and enjoyed it.

of course I crashed, hard. ouch. it was painful, it was intense, but guess what: it was totally worth the flight. I believe life is always perfectly balanced - so of course when you are intensely happy, you will also be intensely sad. but the principle of embracing whatever comes your way also works both ways. and so I learnt that if you let the pain wash over you, absorb you, possess you - if you give in to it - just as you should with the happiness - it is intense, but it goes away much quicker. resistance only drags it out and ends up making it more painful.

so I guess what I want to say is that you should not question your own happiness too much; you should definitely not be scared of falling and crashing - you'll miss the flight. rather, open your eyes, tell you fears to go fish, and enjoy the journey wherever it may take you.

at the dentists

well - after a year and a half in africa I couldn't put it off any longer; I had to get my teeth cleaned. not that I don't clean them twice a day myself - but after millions of cups of tea and coffee and other tooth staining substances I didn't like my smile so much anymore. so I got an appointment yesterday.

it's a dental clinic run by a philippino woman and it has been recommended by several people; however, as a dentist's daughter I had my reservations - but unless you actually bite the bullet you won't get anywhere, right? and besides - I could've always gotten up and walked had I felt it necessary. and to be honest a couple of times I wanted to.

anyway - the 'clinic' is located in shopping centre, in space at the far end of the corridor. the waiting room consists of a few modern plastic chairs and a reception desk made from the typical cheap wood varnished dark. the girl at reception is very nice and she made me fill in a form asking about allergies, whether I'd had heart or liver problems in the past. that was quite comforting. there were even magazines to read whilst waiting; mainly on alaska - I started an article on vets who volunteer at that big race, the name of which I've managed to forget already.

when she said that the dentist had gone out for lunch but should be back shortly I got nervous, but in the end I waited only about 5 minutes - wow. the chair was behind a partition, again, made from this cheap wood and it doesn't reach all the way to the ceiling - so if you're having painful surgery done everyone will hear it all. now that must be comforting for those in the waiting room. but then again, the concept of privacy here is simply different. the chair looked fairly modern, the dentist dressed in a white coat and wearing a mask - so far, so good. he bade me sit down and gingerly tied the serviette round my neck - from there he proceeded to stick the one-way sucking tube into the machine, bent it to the right angle and asked me to hold it in my mouth. that was when I thought: 'you are not seriously going to ask me to do my own sucking?!?' he didn't - the assistant turned up shortly after.

and so they got started and proceeded to scrape the dirt of my teeth with a scaler - now, picture this: I'm lying on a chair with the dentist sticking a scaler and the little mirror in my mouth, the assistant has the sucking device swirling around in my mouth to add to the commotion - and he seriously starts up a conversation with me... 'so, where are you from?' - I nearly choked on the water and spit and instruments all coming together in my mouth - so I sat up, spit into the little sink. he asked me if I was ok - I said, yes, I am - I just can't talk to you...
so the rest of the cleaning proceeded in silence. it took forever and a day and the sound of the scaler travels through your teeth into your brain - not the most relaxing experience. still, I had my eyes closed to avoid the water from the operation and tried going to my happy place. but that was constantly interrupted by the assistant who every so often would drift oft to her own happy place and as a result the sucking device would spend minutes stuck to my tongue, or to the inside of my cheeks, or poking my gag reflex, the water running down my throat or simply down my chin - so every now and again I had to take her hand and re-position the device.


but all in all he did a good job and after just over an hour the scaling was finished. now - the way I'm used to teeth cleaning this is the point at which they 'brush' your teeth with that little rubber thingy and some powerful toothpaste. this hasn't reached here yet. instead he took a small gauze, generously smeared the paste on it and then proceeded to rub my teeth with it. if you have a moment try it - just take a small piece of cloth, put some earthy tasting paste on it and then try and reach your molars with it. I was worried I was going to choke, he was pulling my lips in all directions, rubbing that cloth up agains my teeth claiming that this was helping the whitening process. whatever - it was mainly unpleasant and tasted foul.

but the result is nevertheless a sparkly smile.

erasmus 2.0 - or the perpetual balancing act

a while ago someone described our expat life as an 'erasmus 2.0' suggesting that we were some kids having the time of our lives, enjoying living in big houses, driving posh cars and generally oblivious to the reality around us.

when I had first heard this I got pissed off - how could someone say a thing like this? we are not oblivious to what's going on around us; we don't export our reality to a different country just for kicks; we don't just come here, earn tons of money and have a great time without thinking twice about all the luxuries we can buy for money here - even though we do this also. at the same time I think most of the expats here are well aware that they will not be able to save the world singel-handedly; but you can always try :-) so really, you have to try to balance between nurturing your illusions for which you originally (hopefully) came out here and the acceptance that you will never stop being european, american, whatever you are - and that side of you has to be nurtured too. and I can see how people could think that you are here on an extended action holiday, I guess what has been called erasmus 2.0.

and there is, I guess, a kernel of truth in it - for instance - we threw this party last weekend in honour of swiss national day - it was fancy dress and included typical swiss games such as wrestling and an africanised ski race, alphorns, and other fun things. it was a lush garden party with plenty of food, drink, music and fun. and of course by the end of it no one was in any state to do anything about the mess; so as is usual we walked away from it - we could deal with it the next day. only by the time I woke up and was ready to take a look at the extent of the mayhem my gardener had collected all the empty bottles and put them on the table on the terrace, he had cleared away all the crap, moved the chairs back up onto the terrace - in short - there was practically nothing left to do. I felt bad - it wasn't his job; I can clean up after myself, but I'm going to be honest: I was also chuffed - what a luxury, and one that I would certainly miss.

so I guess evil tongues could call it erasmus 2.0 - I would rather call it self-preservation, going to your happy place from time to time, charge your batteries to be able to confront the harsh realities outside the walls of your compound over and over again and to never stop trying to make this world a better place.